Thoughts on Making Decisions Part 5

Thoughts on Making Decisions I. We know we are to walk by faith, not sight. 2CO 5:7. A. We are to trust God rather than our own understanding. PRO 3:5-6. B. We read in Scripture of God's providential direction of men's lives and may even have experienced the same in our own lives. C. We may be persuaded that because God loves us and has a wonderful plan for our lives, we are relieved of the responsibility of personal decisions, and, after all, God makes all things work together for our good. D. This study is a reminder that Jesus Christ died to take away our sins, not our minds or personal responsibility to make decisions. 1. Common sense need not be contrary to faith. 2. Faith obliges us to have common sense, regulate it by God's word, and put it to work. II. Decisions are basically choices: choices between permissible options or choices concerning impermissible options (things contrary to God's law, 1JO 3:4). A. Believers have only one acceptable choice concerning an impermissible thing: NO. 1. Black and white decisions about known wrong require little critical thought: they are easy decisions. 2. We simply choose to do or not do what we know is wrong. B. But we are faced with myriad decisions where our critical faculties are tested. 1. We may need to first decide whether a thing is permissible or not. For this we are constrained to know God's laws from His word. PSA 119:104, 128; 2TI 3:16-17. 2. There are many revealed “Thou shalt” and “Thou shalt not” laws in Scripture where God's will is crystal clear but what about those “gray” areas? 3. There are many areas of liberty in which there are multiple choices, none of which are necessarily wrong but they can have undesirable consequences: food, hobbies, companions, living accommodations, careers, marriage, single life, pleasures, etc. a. It is these decisions that are the most problematic to us. b. If we want to please God, we don't want to make decisions that displease Him. c. Neither do we want to make decisions which trouble us or those we love. d. But the fact is, we have to make decisions, and this involves effort in thought and the unpleasantness of risk. C. It is our nature to avoid pain and decision-making in the absence of a clear-cut commandment can be painful. This can become a snare. 1. One may make no decision out of concern of what others think. 2. One may make no decision out of concern of it not working out for the best. 3. One may resort to “rolling dice,” letting random chance make the decision. 4. One may resort to looking for mystical signs to guide him, “putting out the fleece” as Gideon did. JDG 6:36-40. 5. One may resort to feelings to direct him. a. We know that feelings are not a basis for interpreting Scripture where God's will for us is revealed. PRO 28:26; JER 17:9. b. If feelings have no authority in interpreting the will of God revealed in Scripture, why should they have authority in deciding the will of God not revealed in Scripture? Thoughts on Making Decisions 1-29-17 Page 1 6. One may let another make the decisions in order to avoid personal responsibility. a. For this reason, many desire a higher power to direct their lives. b. That higher power may take the form of voices in the head which are assumed to be revelation from God. Once one is convinced that the Almighty has thus spoken, how can it be questioned? c. The appeal of the occult is that it offers us a way to escape the responsibility of personal decisions. (1) Man wants his own personal spirit guide, fortune-teller, or guru to decide everything for him. (2) Cult researchers have observed how readily people submit to bondage which relieves them of the heavy freedom they have to carry with all the decisions and efforts that freedom implies. d. For some, religion is a way of coping with difficulty. For others, religion is a way of escaping difficulty. 7. Many of the above are some form of fear: of man, failure, loss, unpopularity, embarrassment, the unknown, etc. a. These are not the means of overcoming this world (1JO 5:4); they are the means of torment. 1JO 4:18. b. The fear of God is healthy but these other fears are not. III. We are taught by example and precept to seek divine direction for our lives and we are promised it shall be given. PSA 25:4-5, 8-9; 31:3; 32:8-9; PRO 3:5-7; EPH 5:15-17. A. Note how that divine direction did not exclude understanding. PSA 32:8-9; EPH 5:17. 1. To have understanding implies knowledge and the wisdom to apply it. 2. It is when we lean on our own understanding without consideration of, or in opposition to the understanding we obtain from God that we err. PRO 1:24-32. 3. Remember the source of our understanding. PSA 119:99-100, 104. B. God's direction of our lives does not exempt us from having to make our own decisions. 1. The same Solomon who wrote PRO 3:5-7 wrote at length also about wisdom and discretion. 2. God made us with the ability to think, to reflect, to analyze, to plan, to choose and to decide. He obviously gave us these abilities to use just as He gave us physical abilities to use. C. We are oft called upon to use our critical faculties. DEU 30:19-20; JOS 24:14-15, 22; ISA 1:18-20; HAG 1:5-10; LUK 14:28-33; JOH 7:24; ACT 6:3-5; 1CO 6:3-4; 10:15; 11:13; TIT 1:5-9. D. Discretion is commanded. PSA 112:5; PRO 3:21-22. 1. discretion: The action of separating or distinguishing; The action of discerning or judging; judgement; decision, discrimination. 2. We have to sort things out and decide upon a course of action. E. We are to prove all things. 1TH 5:21. 1. prove: To make trial of, try, test. 2. The Bereans were commended for proving the apostles. ACT 17:11. 3. Ephesus was likewise commended. REV 2:2. 4. We are to try the spirits to distinguish between truth and error. 1JO 4:1-3. 5. Biblical faith obviously requires the use of reason and critical faculties to discern the truth one is to believe. 6. Paul reasoned out of the Scriptures to persuade men of Christ. ACT 17:2-4; 18:4. Thoughts on Making Decisions 1-29-17 Page 2 IV. Some questions to consider: A. Does God lead us? If so, how: declared laws and principles, vague promptings, impressions, circumstances, coincidences, feelings, internal voices, signs, fortune cookies, ouija boards, tea leaves, astrology, seances? 1. Is divine leading such as EXO 13:21; 40:36-37 normative for believers? 2. Is there prophecy like LUK 21:20-21 for every area of life? 3. Is a Macedonian call such as Paul received (ACT 16:9-10) normative and this is what Paul meant when he wrote of being “...led of the Spirit...” (GAL 5:18)? 4. Should we keep an ass on hand as a safeguard against our poor decisions? 2PE 2:15-16. 5. Is what we plan for the future immutable because we assume to have received extra-scriptural revelation? Is there any point in even saying, “If the Lord will...” (JAM 4:15)? B. Is them as He did to Christ, the prophets and apostles? 1. It is not uncommon to hear Christians say things like, “The Lord spoke to my God's revelation closed or ongoing? Does He lead individual believers by speaking to heart...” and they don't simply mean that a portion of Scripture gave them direction or conviction. It may rather be a strong feeling which prompts them to make a particular decision. 2. Mind that if what someone says the Lord spoke is what is plainly declared in the Bible, that is the same thing He has spoken to everyone else. It is scripture. 3. But if what someone says the Lord spoke is not already in Scripture, then such a person is assuming to have the gift of prophetical inspiration. If that person writes down “what the Lord spoke” then he is writing Scripture since all scripture is given by inspiration (2TI 3:16) and this makes that information binding upon all believers. C. Do you desire God's leading in your life? If so, what kind of leading are you looking for: absolute, limited, specific, general, passive, responsive, mysterious, undefined, defined, responsibility-free, responsible? D. Do you desire to be in the will of God when you make a decision? 1. If so, is the will of God a dot or a circle? 2. Is there an ordained individual will for each believer outside of which is fault? 3. Is there an ordained will for every option in life outside of which is fault? Is compliance with the will of God at stake when deciding which sock to put on first? E. Which is more comfortable for you: having all decisions made for you or having freedom and responsibility to make decisions? F. Does sincerity or good intention equate with a good decision? G. Are the promises of God to guide and guard His people a convenient safety-net which makes prudence and discretion irrelevant? H. Are the laws of nature and probability irrelevant to our decisions because we read of God sometimes overruling them or stepping in to save His children from the tragic consequences of their foolish decisions, as with Lot? 2PE 2:7-8. I. Have you ever used “waiting on the Lord” to cover indecisiveness? V. (ECC 10:10) If the iron be blunt, and he do not whet the edge, then must he put to more strength: but wisdom is profitable to direct. A. For various reasons and misconceptions about God's guidance and providence, Christians Thoughts on Making Decisions 1-29-17 Page 3 may go through life learning everything the hard way and end up being reproved by the plain examples of nature and godless men. PRO 6:6-8; 30:24-28; LUK 16:8. B. If we are seeking direction in decision-making so we can be in God's will, wisdom profits. C. If we are lacking wisdom, we should be praying for it (JAM 1:5-6), searching for it and engaging it. PRO 18:1. D. There is worldly wisdom and God's wisdom so make your first decision for direction a good decision. 1CO 2:4-5. 1. God's wisdom will not contradict the laws, principles and probabilities of this world which are there by His order for all men to observe and gain some understanding. 2. God's wisdom declares those natural laws, exposes their deficiencies and provides a superior guide to help the believer process life in expectation of the life to come. E. A diligent study of Scripture coupled with earnest prayer will result in our understanding every good path. PRO 2:1-22. 1. We will be able to distinguish between positive and misleading influences. 2. This passage emphasizes wisdom, knowledge and understanding over emotional experiences. a. Seek wisdom and understanding instead of pursuing feelings. PRO 4:7. b. It is in wisdom and spiritual understanding that we know the will of God so as to make proper decisions, not in feelings. COL 1:9-10 c/w DEU 4:5-6; PSA 119:104-105. 3. The evil man and the strange woman lead souls into positive but perverse emotional experiences. Not even positive emotions are reliable to determine God's will. a. The Galatians were zealously affected (Gr. zeloo, to have warmth of feeling for or against) against the truth. GAL 4:16-18. b. Christ's disciples' joy countered their faith. LUK 24:41. 4. An interesting example of emotional relationship to truth is LUK 24:32. a. Their hearts burned as Jesus opened to them the Scriptures. b. burn: fig. Of persons, of the heart, etc.: To be on fire (with desire, lust, passion, wrath); to glow, pant. c. The burning of the heart did not open the Scriptures and so determine truth. It occurred while Jesus opened the truth of Scripture to them as a response to truth. d. The burning of the heart did not convey knowledge of truth or decide the will of God. It was rather a reaction to knowledge being gained. c/w NEH 8:12; PSA 119:162. e. Remember, though, that the Galatians also experienced warm feelings (GAL 4:16-18) and that men are commonly roused by stirring oratory to support all kinds of causes, and some of them are terribly bad decisions. 5. Emotions which spring from the heart cannot be trusted because the heart cannot be trusted (PRO 28:26; JER 17:9). The heart must be guided by knowledge of truth; it is not a guide to determine truth for making good decisions. PRO 23:19. a. Decisions made primarily on the basis of emotions to the disregard of wisdom and discretion are virtually guaranteed to be wrong. b. Right thinking produces both right decisions and right emotions. 6. While not denying the reality and importance of emotion, the fact is that is very possible for a Christian, on the basis of emotional signals alone, to “feel out of fellowship” with God for no valid reason or alternately “feel good” about his relationship with God though making decisions contrary to God's word. Thoughts on Making Decisions 1-29-17 Page 4 F. Applying Scriptural principles in making decisions is not leaning to our own understanding. It is rather acknowledging God by consulting with His word and so finding His promised direction for our paths. PRO 3:5-6. VI. We should certainly desire God's leading and guidance in our lives and pray for it when we must make a decision which could have weighty implications for our souls, church, families and even our finances. A. Here are some good prayers with which to begin your quest for God's direction. PSA 119:5; 25:5; 43:3. B. God leads through His righteousness. PSA 5:8; 23:3; PRO 8:20-21; 11:5. 1. Thus it behooves us to continually improve our understanding of what God considers right. PSA 119:128. 2. The better we are acquainted with and conformed to the way God thinks, the better we are fitted to make good decisions that accord with His will and make sense of life before heaven. PSA 73:24. 3. It is for lack of knowledge that destruction comes. HOS 4:6. VII. A big part of decision-making is eliminating morally bad choices. A. After that, whatever choices we make will not involve us in moral evil. B. Rather than between good and bad, our choices will be between good and good or good and better. 1TI 4:4; EPH 4:28; 1CO 7:38. C. What remains of the morally good choices is whether or not they have positive or negative outcomes. This is where wisdom and prudence come into play. 1. wisdom: Capacity of judging rightly in matters relating to life and conduct; soundness of judgement in the choice of means and ends; sometimes, less strictly, sound sense, esp. in practical affairs: opp. to folly. 2. prudence: Ability to discern the most suitable, politic, or profitable course of action, esp. as regards conduct; practical wisdom, discretion. 3. Prudence is the domestic partner of wisdom. PRO 8:12. 4. Prudence wisely weighs information (PRO 14:15) and knows that its judgment can be no better than its source of information. 5. Prudence has foresight enough to recognize evil and avoid it. PRO 22:3. 6. Prudence knows that silence is the best defense in corrupt times. AMO 5:12-13. 7. When Paul exhorts us to understand God's will, he commands circumspection. EPH 5:15-17. a. circumspection: The scanning of surrounding objects or circumstances, careful or wary looking about one; the faculty of doing this. a. literally. b. As a mental action: vigilant and cautious observation of circumstances or events. b. Circumspection demands that we consider present factors and their implications. This would apply to spiritual and practical decisions. D. This emphasis on conscious responsibility rather than supernatural signs, events or extra- scriptural “prompts” accords with the matured status of the church under the N.T. GAL 4:1-7. 1. The church under the law had explicit directives for almost every aspect of life: empirical experiences as where to live and when to move, diet, the Urim and Thummim for tough decisions, etc. Such “hands on” direction is appropriate for a child. Thoughts on Making Decisions 1-29-17 Page 5 2. By contrast, the N.T. church has not only the benefit of all the O.T. revelation which those empirical props confirmed to the church, we have the superior revelation of Jesus Christ (HEB 1:1-2) which only needed empirical props until the completion of the canon of Scripture. 1CO 13:8-10. 3. Having come to maturity, God set the church free to decide and act responsibly based on the treasures of wisdom and knowledge in Christ (COL 2:3), the combined body of law and understanding which are the two testaments of our Bible which declare Him. VIII. Here are some valuable facts about making decisions. A. There are many clear commands which show us God's will for our lives. 1TH 4:1-6; 5:18. 1. These are basically the “no-brainers.” 2. We need not ponder, “Should I commit adultery, murder, steal, blaspheme, apostatize, embrace witchcraft, get drunk, etc.?” 3. Neither should we ponder whether we offend God by love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness or temperance, etc. nor whether we should magnify those things. GAL 5:22-23. B. But not every decision has such “black and white” clarity because God has not specified every detail by commandments. Direction in such areas is by applying Biblical principles. 1. There are things in which it makes no difference to God what we do. ROM 14:5-6; 1CO 8:8. 2. We have liberty in many areas to do what we want within the framework of Biblical principles. ROM 14:14-15, 20-23; 1CO 10:23. 3. God tells the available woman that she is “...at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord” (1CO 7:39). a. Legally, the decision to marry a qualified man is hers. b. Prudently, her decision should be based upon more than the basic, “I'm lonely; I want a knight in shining armour; I want sex; I want children; this guy is available, etc.” c. Such decisions are a true test of N.T. liberty and responsibility. 4. Remember ROM 4:15. Beware of any teacher, impression or voice in your head which establishes “thou shalt nots” which God has not established. COL 2:20-22; 1TI 4:1-5. 5. In the absence of a specific law, we are at liberty to make decisions following Biblical principles which will most likely yield favorable results. a. However, do not be deceived into thinking that Christian liberty justifies making decisions that exploit the flesh before the spirit. GAL 5:13. b. Make decisions which are best for your soul. Remember Lot. C. God's providence superintends our choices and actions and either permits or hinders them. ROM 1:9-13; 15:23-32; 1CO 16:5-7; 1TH 2:17-18; 3:9-11. 1. JAM 4:13-16 relates God's providence to our decision-making. a. We do not know what a day may bring forth. (1) Nothing here instructs us to try to find out what a day may bring forth. (2) Therefore, our knowing what will happen in the future is NOT necessary to finding God's direction for our lives. b. This passage allows us to make plans for the future within the limits of God's revealed will and subject to His providence. Thoughts on Making Decisions 1-29-17 Page 6 c. It is evil to plan for the future without recognition of God's sovereignty. d. However, observe that we do what we decide to do, acting freely, within the limits imposed by the will of God. e. If we had a special revelation from God for everything we would do, it would be incorrect to say, “If the Lord will, we shall live, and do this, or that.” Rather, we should say, “The Lord wills that I do this or that.” 2. We do not have insight into all the workings of God's providence. JOB 33:13; ECC 11:5-6; ROM 11:33. a. God's providence is not our directive rule for much of that is hidden from us. b. Our rule of conduct is rather the things which God has told us in His law. DEU 29:29. 3. Expressions like “If the Lord will” acknowledge that God puts limits or boundaries on men's plans. ISA 10:11-12 c/w PRO 21:1; JOB 38:11. a. Paul frequently made plans with an acknowledgement of God's sovereignty. 1CO 4:19; 16:7; HEB 6:3. b. “It is interesting to note that most of Paul's plans did come to pass (Acts 18:21; 1 Timothy 1:3), just as most of our well-laid plans are accomplished. Each time a carefully devised plan is successful, two truths are reinforced: the importance of wise, orderly planning (Proverbs 24:6); and the effectiveness of God's sovereign will in accomplishing the plans of men and God (Romans 1:10; 15:32).” (Garry Friesen, Decision Making and the Will of God, p. 212) c. When well-laid plans within the revealed will of God are frustrated, it may simply be a matter of the timing not being right (ACT 16:6 c/w 19:26) so we do well to not fret but thank God for His sovereignty. IX. As touching our need and desire to make decisions that accord with God's will, the Traditional approach stands in contrast to the Wisdom approach. A. Traditional says that for each of our decisions, God has a perfect plan or will. Wisdom says that in non-moral decisions, we have liberty and responsibility to choose between various options that are not sinful, some of which may be more profitable than others. B. Traditional says that the goal of the believer is to discover God's individual will (find the “dot”) and make decisions in accordance with it. Wisdom says that God's moral will for all believers is established and uniform but other decisions are made by wisely applying Biblical principles to acceptable options and opportunities. C. Traditional says that the believer interprets inner impressions and outward signs through which the Holy Spirit communicates His leading. Wisdom says that the Holy Spirit leads through believers applying the commands and principles which He has already communicated in Scripture. D. Traditional says that the believer receives confirmation of a decision being in God's will by a sense of inner peace or by positive outward results. Wisdom says that confirmation of a decision being in God's will is by its conformity to commandments and the guidelines in Scripture for Christian conduct in areas of liberty. E. Traditional promotes immaturity, inconsistency, anxiety and disillusionment. 1. It permits believers to justify unwise decisions on the basis of “God told me to do it.” It absolves one of personal responsibility and accountability. 2. It promotes costly delays because of uncertainty about God's perfect individual will. 3. It influences people to reject personal preferences when faced with multiple Thoughts on Making Decisions 1-29-17 Page 7 acceptable options. 4. It encourages the practice of “putting out a fleece” and letting circumstances make the decision. 5. It is inconsistently applied since it is abandoned in minor decisions. 6. It generates anxiety out of concern of “missing the dot” of the one correct choice that was God's will rather than being thankful for multiple choices. ROM 14:6. 7. It facilitates disillusionment when a decision assumed to be God's will is made on the basis of nebulous, subjective factors and it produces negative results. F. The Traditional view does generally place strong emphasis on understanding the Bible because it assumes that a great deal of God's will for the individual is spelled out there. The Wisdom view says that ALL of God's will for the individual is spelled out in the Bible. G. The goal of the Traditional view (certain knowledge of God's individual will) is unreachable but the goal of the Wisdom view (adequate knowledge of God's moral will plus wisdom) is attainable. X. The examples of the wisdom of creatures (PRO 6:6-8; 30:24-28) and the unjust steward (LUK 16:8-9) show us that common sense is important. A. We are not relieved of personal responsibility to pursue wisdom and apply it because we have God to mysteriously guide us, back us up or save us from the consequences of foolish decisions. GAL6:4-5. B. Following Christ by faith is sufficient to make us look like fools and lunatics in the eyes of an unbelieving world. Why give them more rocks to throw by going through life with obvious disregard to plain facts available to all men? Christians, of all people, should be exercising good judgment. 1CO 6:1-6. C. Common sense, though, must take a backseat to revelation. 1. The wise creatures from whom we may learn may also be savage, ruthless and merciless towards even their own species: enslaving, cannibalizing or eliminating them if they are not beneficial to society. 2. Common sense might look at the creation and conclude that sexual activity is to be regulated only by brute instinct or that androgynous anomalies in nature justify gender-swapping in humans. 3. Common sense might reason that as one would not commit to a major purchase like a car without testing it out, so one should not commit to marriage without finding out if there is sexual compatibility, thereby justifying pre-marital fornication. XI. One's character is itself a guiding principle to help make good decisions which please God. PRO 11:3, 5. A. integrity: In moral sense. †a. Unimpaired moral state; freedom from moral corruption; innocence, sinlessness. b. Soundness of moral principle; the character of uncorrupted virtue, esp. in relation to truth and fair dealing; uprightness, honesty, sincerity. B. righteousness: Justice, uprightness, rectitude; conformity of life to the requirements of the divine or moral law; virtue, integrity. 1. All God's commandments are righteousness. PSA 119:172. 2. The righteousness of the perfect is his conformity to those commandments both by the imputed righteousness of Christ and the practice of that righteousness in personal obedience. 1JO 3:7. C. virtue: (ad. L. virtūt-, virtus manliness, valour, worth, etc., f. vir man) Conformity of life and conduct with the principles of morality; voluntary observance of the recognized moral Thoughts on Making Decisions 1-29-17 Page 8 laws or standards of right conduct; abstention on moral grounds from any form of wrong- doing or vice. 1. valour: The quality of mind which enables a person to face danger with boldness or firmness; courage or bravery, esp. as shown in warfare or conflict; valiancy, prowess. 2. JOS 1:7 and 1KI 2:2-3 call for virtue as the dictionary defines it. D. Wanting to do right because it is right and having courage to do right (virtue) will bar the way to many morally corrupt or compromised paths. 1. Much personal grief or even sin is introduced in life for lack of a strong will to stand on principle or a lack of courage to deal with everyday things of life because of personal insecurities, etc. Oftentimes, the biggest monster we face is the warped perception we have of ourselves which is not shaped by what God tells us about our identity and power in Christ nor by the obvious realities of the world and human nature. 2. There is much less chance of yielding to peer pressure when integrity and virtue are guiding our decisions. E. Righteousness is set forth as a thing to follow, a guiding principle. 1TI 6:11; 2TI 2:22. F. God's wrath is revealed against ALL unrighteousness. ROM 1:18, 29-32; 1CO 6:9-10. 1. Hence, the demand for righteousness is not to be held in contempt. PRO 14:9. 2. Unrighteousness sets one up to be misled. ROM 7:11; HEB 3:12-13; 2TH 2:8-12. 3. Therefore, sin must not be spared, sampled, regarded or excused, but mortified. ROM 8:13. G. Righteousness lies at the heart of the following instructions to be applied in making decisions. 1. (1CO 16:14) Let all your things be done with charity. a. This is to be above all else. COL 3:14; 1PE 4:8. b. Charity (love) fulfills the law. MAT 22:37-40; ROM 13:10. c. Run your choices and decisions through 1CO 13:4-7 and eliminate any that conflict with that grid. 2. (MAT 7:12) Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets. 3. (ROM 14:16-19) Let not then your good be evil spoken of: (17) For the kingdom of God is not meat and drink; but righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost. (18) For he that in these things serveth Christ is acceptable to God, and approved of men. (19) Let us therefore follow after the things which make for peace, and things wherewith one may edify another. a. If you are acceptable to God (v. 18), you ARE in the center of His will. b. If a choice does not pass the test of righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost, eliminate it. c. We ought to consider the effect of our choices not only upon ourselves but upon others also. 4. (ROM 13:14) But put ye on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make not provision for the flesh, to fulfil the lusts thereof. 5. (ROM 12:17-18) Recompense to no man evil for evil. Provide things honest in the sight of all men. (18) If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men. 6. (1TH 5:22) Abstain from all appearance of evil. 7. (ROM 14:22-23) Hast thou faith? have it to thyself before God. Happy is he that Thoughts on Making Decisions 1-29-17 Page 9 condemneth not himself in that thing which he alloweth. (23) And he that doubteth is damned if he eat, because he eateth not of faith: for whatsoever is not of faith is sin. H. The thought life shapes character. PRO 4:23; 23:7. 1. Our minds will think with the information they are fed and that will influence decision-making. Garbage in, garbage out. 2. We should definitely think on the things listed in PHIL 4:8. a. These things make for good character. b. This is a grid through which we may filter sources of information and entertainment. I. There is no unrighteousness in those who seek God's honour rather than their own honour. JOH 7:18. 1. When making decisions, we should carefully weigh whose honour we seek. 2. The righteousness of seeking God's honour will help filter out God-dishonouring and self-serving decisions. J. Having a prepared resolve to do right can make even difficult matters easy to decide. 1. Daniel's purpose of heart laid the groundwork for deciding a difficult matter. DAN 1:8. 2. Consider the following resolutions. PSA 26:4-5, 11; 56:3; 101:2-3; 119:115. 3. Having godly core principles which are not up for debate will prevent many bad decisions even when something difficult is suddenly sprung on you. K. Since character is influenced by associations, we do well to choose companions wisely. PRO 13:20; 1CO 15:33. 1. How many terrible decisions have been made because of peer pressure! 2. Rehoboam's companions inspired his fateful decision which split a country. 1KI 12:1-20. 3. (PRO 9:6) Forsake the foolish, and live; and go in the way of understanding. 4. (PSA 119:63) I am a companion of all them that fear thee, and of them that keep thy precepts. XII. Parents should impart godly direction to their children to form their character. PRO 22:6; 29:15. A. “...the WAY he should go...” implies direction. B. Godly training of children is one of God's means for directing our lives. C. Values such as reverence for God, respect for authority, truthfulness, fairness, diligence, responsibility, cleanliness, temperance and modesty which are instilled in children from the time they are babes will prepare a child for good decisions throughout life. D. Foolishness is hereditary (PRO 22:15) but virtue must be trained into a child. 1. train: To treat or manipulate so as to bring to the proper or desired form. To subject to discipline and instruction for the purpose of forming the character and developing the powers of, or of making proficient in some occupation. (Also with up.) a. To instruct and discipline generally; to educate, rear, bring up. 2. Manipulation is the parent's domain, not the child's. E. Nowhere does Scripture teach that parents should train up their children in the art of deciphering circumstances, inner voices, impressions or feelings in order to make decisions in accord with God's will. F. God gave parents, not signposts, feelings or villages for children's direction and the parents had better take their responsibility seriously. This is an area where decisions will have life- long consequences for parent and child. Thoughts on Making Decisions 1-29-17 Page 10 XIII. Decision-making should begin with major foundational decisions which direct the course of later decisions. Joshua's decision stands out here. JOS 24:15. A. Christ is the best foundation. 1CO 3:11; MAT 7:24-25. 1. The decision to follow Christ is the most important decision. ACT 17:30-31. 2. How one builds on Christ (future decisions) will be tested. 1CO 3:12-15. 3. If we have committed to wholly follow Christ, we will decide for things that enhance that and against things which would interfere with that. a. Since following Christ requires identifying with a local church (ACT 2:38- 41) and regular assembly (HEB 10:25), we should make decisions that agree with those objectives. MAT 6:33. b. Since God wills that we be able to give, we should make financial decisions that enable us to do that according to our own purpose. EPH 4:28 c/w 2CO 9:6-7. c. Since quietness and meditation are vital to our spiritual health, we should make decisions to accommodate them. ECC 4:6; PSA 1:1-3. d. Since too much care will choke God's word, we should limit cares. LUK 8:14 c/w 1CO 7:32. B. Life relationships like marriage and family are foundational decisions. 1. Paul makes clear in 1CO 7 that marriage or celibacy are choices in accord with the will of God. 2. Whether one marries or not depends on one's ability to contain oneself sexually. 1CO 7:1-2, 8-9. a. Celibacy is a gift only to some (MAT 19:11-12), and we are warned against boasting of a false gift (PRO 25:14). b. “For the man lacking self-control, the choice is between potential distraction (marriage) or potential destruction (celibacy).” (Garry Friesen, Decision Making and the Will of God, p. 291) 3. If one chooses to marry, Paul gives regulation for the married state. 4. The freedom of personal choice in the marriage issue is affirmed in vs. 25-28, 36-40. 5. Though not the only factor in decision-making, one's personal happiness is a factor to be considered. 1CO 7:40. 6. Deciding to marry or remain celibate are both acceptable choices to God as long as one obeys God's moral law relative to either state. a. Marriage requires sexual fidelity (JOB 31:1) and godly relating. EPH 5:22-33. b. Celibacy is not to be equated with self-mutilation or perverse sexual activities or relationships. 7. One's decision to marry should flow out of one's commitment to Christ. a. A Christian should desire a spouse who will work with them to build a marriage in keeping with biblical instructions. One should be realistic about a potential mate's attitudes towards this goal. b. If a couple has children, the biblical training of those children will be handicapped in a divided household. c. How one chooses to educate children should flow out of commitment to Christ. (1) There are pro's and con's to public school, private school and home Thoughts on Making Decisions 1-29-17 Page 11 school. (2) School choice should take into consideration the potentials for enhancing or frustrating the need to bring up children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. EPH 6:4. (3) Remember what you were taught in the series, Downside and Dangers of the Digital Age. Even Silicon Valley executives recognize the inherent problems of electronic media relative to child development. C. A career or job should have an eye to God's law. 1. Employees have a moral duty to obey their employer. EPH 6:5-8. 2. Will a job reasonably provide for one's own plus biblical needs of others? 1TI 5:8; EPH 4:28. 3. Would better education or training be in order? ECC 10:15. 4. Will a job frustrate obligations to God and family? XIV. Spiritual expediency is a factor in decision-making. 1CO 6:12. A. expedient: Conducive to advantage in general, or to a definite purpose; fit, proper, or suitable to the circumstances of the case. B. Christians have a definite purpose: pleasing God (HEB 13:21; 11:5). Therefore, our pleasure in decisions we make in an area of liberty may have to take a backseat to what pleases God. 1CO 10:31-33. C. Spiritual expediency prompted Paul to make certain decisions based on high priorities. 1TH 3:1-8; PHIL 2:25-30. 1. Mind that these were decisions which Paul thought good and supposed necessary. 2. Paul had no specific commandment: these were judgment calls HE made. 3. He did not have absolute knowledge of all factors and possibilities but based his decision upon prudent evaluation of available information and upon biblical priorities. D. Spiritual expediency should establish priorities when making decisions. 1. Prioritizing means saying “no” to people, activities and opportunities that would encroach upon those priorities. 2. You will not always be available for everybody and everything that would demand your time. a. Time is a precious commodity that is to be redeemed if we would be in the will of God. EPH 5:15-17; COL 4:5. b. Spending great amounts of time agonizing over a decision about a relatively insignificant thing out of concern of finding the “dot” of God's perfect will may actually put you out of the will of God. c. “The perfect is the enemy of the good.” (Voltaire) d. Don't sweat the small stuff and much of it is small stuff. 3. Christ did not let men keep Him from fulfilling His priorities. LUK 4:42-43. 4. Paul's good priorities played a strong role in his decisions. ACT 18:20-21; 20:16; ROM 15:20-28. XV. Do appropriate research, when necessary, to make wise decisions. A. Nehemiah discreetly researched a major building project. NEH 2:12-16. B. This principle is at the basis of Christian discipleship. LUK 14:28-33. C. This principle is critical in the big decisions of everyday living, business, military strategy, Thoughts on Making Decisions 1-29-17 Page 12 etc. D. This is the work of decision-making that people would like to escape by having a little inner voice or a sign tell them what to do because of invalid fears. 1. Fear can be a mask for sloth. PRO 22:13. 2. Let us not grow a wishbone where we should have a backbone. XVI. Scripture teaches us to seek the counsel of wise persons in making decisions. PRO 12:15; 13:1, 20; 20:18. A. wise: Having or exercising sound judgement or discernment; capable of judging truly concerning what is right or fitting, and disposed to act accordingly; having the ability to perceive and adopt the best means for accomplishing an end; characterized by good sense and prudence. Opp. to foolish. B. There are wise people who can give good counsel. 2SAM 16:23; 20:16-18; ECC 9:13-18. 1. This should certainly be the case in the church. ROM 15:14; 1CO 6:5. 2. “God has not promised to whisper 'perfect plans' or omniscience into the mind of any believer who asks. Accordingly, the apostles counseled that when a decision is required, those who are 'full of...wisdom' (Acts 6:3) and 'prudent' (1 Timothy 3:2) will do the best job. The church has not been told to identify those who are best at picking up and decoding inner impressions, but those who are mature and wise (1 Corinthians 6:5).” (Garry Friesen, Decision Making and the Will of God, p. 261) C. We are told that there is safety in seeking out many counselors. PRO 11:14; 15:22; 24:6. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. uncertainty. When we are decisive, we weigh the information that is available to us and we use our judgement to choose among the possibilities. It is easier to be decisive when we are clear about our values and goals. Decisiveness means taking the risk that we may be wrong, but knowing that perfect clarity is rarely available and indecision can be costly. It also means taking responsibility for the outcome of the decision. Together, research, analysis and decisiveness get great things done.” (Anon.) Be wary of twisting this principle as Rehoboam did (1KI 12), shopping for the counsel that agrees with your lusts. c/w 2CH 18:7. Seek out spiritually mature counselors for Biblical principles that apply to a decision that you are facing. Seek the counsel of those who have experience in the area you are considering. Scorners will not seek counsel from the wise. PRO 15:12. a. Those who avoid seeking counsel commonly do so because they know their plans would not meet with a good counselor's approval. b. “Matrimonial cases have been numerous, and sometimes intricate and perplexed; made so not by the law of God, but by the lusts and follies of men; and often in these cases people resolve, before they ask, what they will do.” (Matthew Henry Commentary, Mat. 19:3-12) The best counsellers are God's testimonies (PSA 119:24), the keeping of which can make one wiser than the ancients. PSA 119:100; 1TI 4:12. Seeking counsel should not be viewed as a shifting of responsibility, a convenient way of blaming someone else if things don't work out well. The decision and responsibility still remain with the inquirer. leaders know that indecision or making no decision because of the possibility of an error, apart because of a decision that was wrong are fatal traits in leadership. A. “Decisiveness is the willingness to make decisions, even in the face of complexity or XVII. Effective or falling Thoughts on Making Decisions 1-29-17 Page 13 B. When Joshua was distressed over a humiliation because of a decision he had made, God reproved him. JOS 7:7-10. C. Sometimes our indecision is simply owing to the fact that we can't bear the thought of making a potential mistake because our image would be tarnished by that. 1. This is essentially a pride issue. We are plainly told to eschew pride and to not think of ourselves more highly than we ought. ROM 12:3. 2. Life is full of decisions that have to be made. Let not the fear of an imperfect decision prevent the making of a decision. Waverers are not in control. JAM 1:6. D. “In any moment of decision the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.” (Theodore Roosevelt) XVIII. There is a voice within us that should be heeded for direction in making decisions: conscience. ACT 24:16; 1TI 1:19. A. conscience: Consciousness of right and wrong; moral sense. The internal acknowledgement or recognition of the moral quality of one's motives and actions; the sense of right and wrong as regards things for which one is responsible; the faculty or principle which pronounces upon the moral quality of one's actions or motives, approving the right and condemning the wrong. B. The conscience is our inward awareness of right and wrong. It is not infallible but when it is instructed by God's law (preeminently the two great commandments), it is an effective guide in decision-making. C. It IS God's will that we heed the voice of conscience. D. To violate conscience even with regard to something that is not sinful is to defile it and incur judgment. ROM 14:14, 20-23. Thoughts on Making Decisions 1-29-17 Page 14
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